I am my last client. The structure and methods I used to help people grow are not lost on me. I’m not some sage that sits at the top of life, having figured it out, who will spend my days guiding others down the straight and narrow. I’m not Buddha or a Saint. I am human, and at this point, I have to fall into the next stage of becoming by taking up space, filling up my identity, and including all of me in the spaces I walk into.

Life Coach was never my ultimate form. It was an opportunity for others to benefit from the real WORK that I was putting in on myself. In my classes and cohorts, they said I seemed to be so comfortable or confident with what I was doing. I never was. I was only confident that I was passing through and learning skills that would help me and others along my journey.

If I may say, they don’t tell you this: growing too much is lonely. You don’t feel lonely; you just are alone. Always present, always making space, always encouraging, but never encountering those who feel the same isolation after having grown so much. You stand out in a crowd. You’re almost never dysregulated, and when you are, it doesn’t last for long. It is an unrelatable state of existence. You’re not perfect by any means; rather, only someone more ascended can even point you in the right direction. You take one action, and you immediately see how the health of the other person determines how they take what you did or said, and you, reading them like a book, prepare your reframe with the truth.

People don’t know how to take you or respond to you. You walk into a room, and it’s like they’re afraid you’re going to tell them—the emperor of their world—about their new clothes.

So I decided, this is enough growth for now. This is plenty. And I’m giving myself permission to go be human. To not people-please; to disrupt (positively); to challenge anyone regardless of status; to care but not be overburdened by trying to appear high EQ. Who cares how it looks? Who cares how it sounds? Other than me? Now I’m free to be, and I will make enemies along the way; fine. I can’t wait to meet them.